A Glass Full of Water

You all know about the half empty or half full glass of water. By saying how you see it, you will understand if you are an optimist or not.

And if you would like another perspective on a half empty or half full glass, you can read Wynne’s post The Glass Is Refillable.

But what you are going to read here is something different that I saw recently in a simple, short but very effective video.

A professor during a lecture surprised his students by showing a full glass of water in his hand.  The students, who thought he would talk about the classic concept of a glass half empty or half full were amazed when he asked them about the weight of the glass. His intention was quite different, in fact he did not want to explain the concept of glass half empty or half full.

The answers were different and most of them could be considered acceptable. However, the explanation given by the professor was different and much deeper.

The weight of the glass depends on the time you will have to hold it. If you hold it in your hand for 5 minutes, it is very unlikely that you will have troubles. However, if you hold it in your hand for 2 hours, the arm will get tired. And if you hold it even longer, let’s say one day, the arm will be as if paralyzed and eventually the glass will fall.

The same happens with stress.  If you are under stress for a relatively short period of time you will have no side effects. But if you experience stress for weeks and months, you may eventually get sick.

The disease in this case would be of psychosomatic origins.

What is a psychosomatic disorder?

The word psychosomatic comes from the Greek psyche “soul” and soma “body”. A psychosomatic illness occurs when the mind creates an alteration of the body.

For example, imagine that you have a colleague, or a person you know, who often criticizes you.

Their criticisms are not sporadic, on the contrary they are recurrent enough to become a habit. This behaviour also creates a negative environment around you.

If you can’t get rid of this stress in time, you’ll accumulate so much negativity that it could cause side effects on your health. It would be like holding a glass full of water for a whole day.

This reality is unfortunately so common that it is even believed that some physical illnesses can worsen due to mental factors such as stress and anxiety. It is believed, for example, that conditions such as psoriasis, eczema, gastric ulcers, hypertension and many heart diseases can occur due to psychosomatic problems such as stress or anxiety.

Would you like to learn some techniques to reduce stress: have a look at the conclusion on this article published on wiseandshinezine.com.

What about you? What are the solutions you adopt to fight your stress?

stress handwritten text on white printer paper
Stress – Photo by Pedro Figueras on Pexels.com

The Power of Intuition

Intuition has always been a fascinating subject of study. It is generally associated with genius, because the greatest scientific discoveries happened thanks to moments of intuition.

Einstein wrote:

Intuition is a sacred gift of which reason is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honours the servant and forgets the gift.

In addition, we all know that it is thanks to our intuition that we make some of the decisions of our lives, even if we consider ourselves rational and Cartesian beings.

From the point of view of the Eastern religions (Buddhism, Hinduism, Taoism) there is no mystery. In the traditional languages of these millennial wisdoms, the terms designating knowledge, consciousness, lucidity are often identical.

Attachment to mental constructions, beliefs, and concepts, as well as the mental agitation that accompanies it, are seen by them as a veil over primordial intelligence. Buddhists explain it like that:

if we do not stir water, it will become clear by itself. In the same way, if we leave unchanged the nature of the spirit, and we do not manipulate it, it will find peace and clarity on its own.

But let’s go back to the West and see that to make a decision we will evaluate three elements:

  1. rational analysis,
  2. emotional aspect,
  3. intuitive wisdom.

However, if we practise meditation, thoughts and emotions would calm down, and intuition would manifest. In fact, there are several testimonies from practitioners who tell that the most creative ideas came at the end of their meditation.

In a linear, predictable, and orderly environment, a rational analysis is often more effective for deciding and planning an action.

On the contrary, in a volatile, unpredictable, or chaotic environment, when the human element predominates, intuitive intelligence becomes useful.

Therefore, meditation is more and more used in our times, as we live in an ever-increasing insecurity and instability.

How intuition works

Intuition draws on three main resources.

  1. Like a tree, the first source is the ramification of its roots. It is the entirety of information, of experiences lived in the past and stored in the unconscious.
  2. The second source is comparable to the leaves of a tree. These are the strong or weak signals, picked up in the present instant.  All these signals are undefined and cannot be evaluated by rational analysis.
  3. The third source is collective intelligence. In fact, our personal intuition can go beyond temporal and spatial limitations. Intuitive intelligence can tap into a nearly unlimited source, outside the limits of time, space, and the individual. All this is normal according to Buddhist philosophy where, for example, the individual, time, and space are conceptual categories created by the mind.
two brown trees
Trees – Photo by Johannes Plenio on Pexels.com
How do you synthesize these sources of information?

Cognitive science researchers have tried to answer.

Just before an intuition, there is a “letting go” moment, a descent within us. Then, suddenly, the presence increases, there is a kind of awakening, a feeling of unity and inner agreement. There is also a feeling of evidence, of surprise, of amazement and wonder.

These are the elements that we also find in a meditative experience: letting go, increased presence, awakening, unity.

It is necessary to emphasize the essential place occupied by the body in intuitive intelligence.

How many times have you made rational or emotional decisions while your body opposed it? Did you regret this decision a few days, months or years later? It happened to me several times in my life. I should have listened to the signals that my body sent me and taken them into account when making my decision.

In this regard, body scan meditation can help to develop this sixth sense of intuition. We shall also consider that if we constantly ignore the body’s messages, we might experience illness, pain, or disorder. Which is what happened to me.

Intuition, beyond the help it provides us in making decisions, is our deep inner voice, our wisdom, our most precious guide. It is important to learn to listen to it and to look after it.

To conclude if you hesitate to follow your intuition, try asking yourself these two questions, which will help you clarify what is at stake:

  1. What do I risk following my intuition?
  2. What do I not risk following my intuition?

What do you think about intuition? Do you agree with me that it is powerful?

This article has been previously published on Wise&Shine magazine.

Seven Simple Rules to Follow

We are approaching the end of summer. For those who have already returned from vacation it may be difficult to go back to everyday life, to start over with the usual routine.

So, I would like to share with you seven simple rules to follow for a quiet and less stressful life:

1. Make peace with your past so that it won’t disturb your future.

2. What other people think of you is none of your business.

3. The only person responsible for your happiness is you.

4. Don’t compare yourself to others, you may get hurt.

5. Time heals almost everything. Give yourself more time.

6. Stop thinking so much. Accept not to know all the answers.

7. Smile. You cannot control all the problems in the world.

Would you consider following these simple rules? Do you have any other to add? Let me know!

two yellow emoji on yellow case
Smile – Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

The Link Between Sleep & Weight

Do you know that sleeping less than 7 hours will make you gain weight? Let’s see how.

It is known that sleep affects overall well-being, but few people know that it also has a direct link to your weight.

This relationship was highlighted by a study conducted by researchers at the University of Chicago, coordinated by Dr. Eva Van Cauter, director of the Center for Sleep and Metabolism. According to scientific research, sleeping less than 7 hours a night would contribute significantly to weight gain. The reason is that less sleep corresponds to a greater appetite during the day because the body automatically tends to feed more to stay awake longer. Sleep is in fact an essential condition for regulating many biological mechanisms, both mental and physical.

While you sleep, your metabolism slows down, allowing your body to consume less and optimize its energy reserves. Sleeping poorly and a few hours interrupts this rhythm, so increased appetite is one of the many ways nature tries to compensate for what it lacks. It is estimated that just one hour less sleep than the recommended average of 7/8 hours translates into a consumption of about 300 extra calories per day and 1 kilogram of extra body weight per week!

All this is due to the decrease in the satiety hormone, while ghrelin, the hunger hormone, increases. That is why, despite attempts to lose weight through exercise, few results are achieved. It is obvious that sleeping more and better is not the only thing you can do, but it is a good habit that should be part of a healthy lifestyle, including a rich and varied diet.

Therefore, to get back in shape, in addition to going to the gym and seeking advice from a nutritionist, you could simply increase the hours and quality of your sleep, thus restoring the balance of your body.

How to avoid arguments with your partner

How to avoid arguments with your partner? It may seem strange to you, but the way you argue with your partner says a lot about the relationship. Arguments demonstrate that you care about each other’s feelings!

Even if you complain, for example, that you are bored, or you are left alone too often, this is a sign that you would like to spend more time with your partner and share intense moments with him/her.

Here are 5 tips to avoid arguments with your partner.

1 – Do not say anything that you will immediately regret, be sure to stick to the topic discussed, and listen carefully to your partner. In the end you may be wrong and it would be wise to admit it.

2 – It is important to recognize when you and your partner can no longer have constructive discussions. If every time you have to debate a topic, you end up getting angry, it’s time to work on managing the conflict.

3 – You shall be ready to see the other person’s point of view, how they feel, what they expect from you and what they want to do to regain happiness.

4 – It is normal to be upset, however, screaming, having vulgar language, and anything else that could hurt your partner mentally or physically is going to have disastrous consequences. Try to remember why the discussion started, what the issue was, why it needed to be addressed, and do your best to see your partner’s point of view.

5 – Finally, keep your emotions under control. Remember that if your emotions take over it may be destructive. You should try to make a strong and reasonable case. If the topic of the dispute is particularly sensitive, it is even more important for you to control your emotions. The purpose of an argument is not to hurt each other, but rather to reconnect with each other in ways you didn’t do before.

Don’t hesitate to share these simple tips with people around you, you may save a couple in trouble!

unrecognizable couple holding hands at sunset
Reconnection – Photo by Trung Nguyen on Pexels.com

Would You Recognize Anxiety in One of Your Friends?

If you have been lucky enough not to have suffered from anxiety disorders, you may not understand what it means to be in such a situation of psychological distress.

Family or friends, mostly out of fear, tend to think that the person suffering is not strong enough or determined to get out of it.  However, no one chooses to be anxious or depressed, and no one has the magic wand to put an end to such suffering.

Moreover, people who suffer from anxiety are not as easily spotted as you may think. Many victims of anxiety often wear an unconscious mask of confidence and apparent happiness.

They want to hide a disorder that is very difficult to live with because they feel the constant apprehension of revealing it to their loved ones. Anxious people would not want to cause additional worries that could be difficult for their family and friends to deal with. They are also afraid that the relationships could be strongly impacted.

Therefore it may be difficult for families and friends to detect or recognise anxiety disorders.

However, if one of your friends in distress would end up speaking to you about their true condition, then you could try to provide appropriate support. Dialogue, emotional presence and referral to health professionals such as a psychotherapist who would help identify the basic problem are some of the first steps towards healing.

Would you like some tips on getting rid of anxiety? Have a look here!

Becoming Older, Becoming Wiser

Becoming older means also becoming wiser. You realize what really matters in your life, what you privilege and who you choose to spend your time with.
Priority goes to what really matters in your life

During your youth, you felt almost always excited and you believed that the world was in your hands. You thought you had all the time ahead to realize and live your dreams. Becoming older makes you understand that time is limited and therefore precious. 

Because of that, you want to enjoy every minute and every second with what is essential for you. Going out in the evening and getting home very late (or also very early the day after), nights spent drinking, dancing until your feet would hurt, no longer interest you. What matters is enjoying the time spent with your family, dedicating them qualitative time, that is time of exchange, time that counts and that is not forgotten. You realize that time flies, so you want to favour the present moment. Looking at photos together, savouring the small magical moments of hugs, or playing with your children are moments of unforgettable happiness.

Avoiding self-righteous people

Hypocrisy is no longer part of your life as an adult (at least it should be). Sincerity is what you are looking for. Instead of uttering an uninteresting sentence to someone you barely know or don’t particularly like, you’d rather be sincere, kind but sincere. At the same time, you will be attracted to people who are honest in their gestures, words and actions; people who bring a positive note to your life.

Respecting the lives of others.

Time and experience are great teachers when it comes to knowing oneself and the others. Wisdom teaches you to turn away from the problems and conflicts that don’t concern you, so as to avoid getting involved with bad energy. Therefore, respecting the lives of others becomes a fundamental principle. 

Restricting your circle of friends

By ageing, the idea of making new friends doesn’t interest you any longer. Your priorities are more related to your family. You seek good friends rather than many friends. You try to build healthy relationships and you want to avoid toxic people.

Becoming older means crossing many paths with pitfalls. However, the difficulties that life presented you, allowed you to become stronger, more determined and wiser. 

You have learned to know the difference between a person who is harmful to your well-being and a person full of positive energy who brings you joy and good mood.

Which other advantages would you see in becoming older?

photo of pathway surrounded by fir trees
Pahts in Life – Photo by James Wheeler on Pexels.com

Ideas to Try Out in Your Free Time (last part)

Here are the last ideas (for the moment) that came up to my mind and that you could try our in your free time. The previous parts are published here.

  • Plan a trip “on the road”. Offer yourself a little adventure to organize a road trip. Take a road map, identify a path that you do not know, and maybe not so well known. Look for a place to stop for the night. Check the weather forecast and go!
  • Try “geocaching”. Do you know what geocaching is? It is a so-called “experiential” game, which is nothing more than the technological evolution of the classic treasure hunt. Participants, called “geocachers”, use a GPS device or an App on a Smartphone to hide or find containers of different types and sizes. Sometimes they are organized by voluntary associations to raise funds, so participating would also help to finance a good cause. You will find them of any types, from the simplest to the most elaborate, sometimes with puzzles to solve.
  • Make a bucket list. A bucket list is a list of things you want to do in your life, from your goals to your dreams, and also the experiences you want to live. Once completed, choose a wish and make it come true!
  • Rest. It is decided, in your free time you do nothing. It is your right, if you get bored know that boredom could prove to be a source of creativity. Doing nothing helps you recreate your regenerating sphere to which you consciously or unconsciously aspire.

To conclude, I would like to stress the importance of the mentality with which you approach your free time. Sometimes it would be more useful to take leave also from yourself and not only from your job.. Going on vacations not always means making emptiness within yourself, freeing yourself from everyday thoughts. Sometimes going on vacations means fleeing, running away from your reality. And escaping from everyday life doesn’t mean your mental worries go on vacations too!

If you would like to send me your ideas, I will add to future posts to be published in my blog!

Thank you for reading so far!

Writing Your Ideas – Photo by energepic.com from Pexels